| Guitar Toting Nuns |
[Nov. 16th, 2005|12:01 pm] |
Some of the best moments in life are when you see something so stereotypical, it's hard to believe. Today I saw a nun carrying a guitar. She wasn't the "Sister Act" tight habit sorta nun, but more the hill roaming "Sound of Music" type. Oddly enough, I just bought the "Sound of Music" yesterday, but that's beside the point.
The nun with the guitar reminded me of a feeling I get from seeing a living stereotype. Try to remember how you felt seeing Santa Claus in the mall and you'll get a taste of how I felt.
People use the word stereotype to describe placing a certain attribute on an entire group. Often stereotypes are looked at as being mean, sometimes racist, and untrue. But to be honest I'm finding more and more that "stereotype" is just another way of saying "generally true."
When I was in Canada I was exposed to a very large Asian populous. Not a lot of people know that certain parts of Canada, this one being Vancouver, are made up of this particular group. But they all culminate in this growing city, and no city is complete without drivers.
I'd always heard "Asians drive slow," but I always thought of it as a falsity. But being in an area primarily made up of this racial group, the effect was magnified and I experience it ten fold. For one of the first times in my life, I actually agreed with a stereotype, and I didn't feel racist. I felt ignorant and triumphant, as if I discovered Atlantis after I was told it didn't exist.
To not anger anyone let me say I to fall into a stereotype, I'm white and I can't dance. Everyone knows white people can't dance, that's just a fact. But what is untrue about this particular one is that we have no rhythm. I have rhythm; the problem comes from being able to move in a fluid motion to display that rhythm. I can clap my hands to a beat, that's proof of my rhythm skills. What white people do to make up for the not being able to dance, is we just dance funny. We know we're gonna look it, so we go all out. What ends up happening is that our not being able to dance turns into non-traditional dancing, so we are dancing, just in our own ways. More often then not, these people become the life of the party, so I guess I should be saying thank you for putting me in this stereotype. I may not be able to dance, but I'm awesome at dancing horribly.
I love stereotypes, love 'em. Because what they do is amplify our flaws and give us all a chance to laugh at them. The total absurdity of them all, and the hint of truth in them, makes them that way. Black people eat chicken, Jews have lots of money, all Asians can play the piano, Irish people are always drunk, and white people can't dance. When you learn to laugh at these, especially if you’re in the group, you'll learn to be able to live with who you are and finally be able to say, "ya know...that's true." |
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| The Lazy Person and the Elevator |
[Nov. 7th, 2005|06:13 pm] |
In the CSUN library, on occasion I take the elevator to the 3rd floor where the computers are. What I've noticed, and what really bothers me, is when someone gets into the elevator only to go up to the second floor. To me that's abusing the elevator, and making people in the elevator wait an unnecessary amount of seconds people you're to lazy to use the escalator (yea escalator, the moving stairs) or even the normal stairs.
Today, just as the doors were about to finish closing, they re-opened because girl pressed the button; that's strike one. You DO NOT press the button JUST as there about to close; do you know how annoying that is? Cause they I have to wait for you to get in and press the button. THEN she presses the 2nd floor button; strike two. So first she makes me wait, and then she presses the button I hate. We stop at the floor, the door opens, and she says "are the computers on this floor?" We say no and she doesn't get off! Strike three bitch, you're going down! Plus she sounded foreign, and you all know how much I hate foreigners. Coming to this country not speaking English, how dare they!
Anyways, next time you go into an elevator DO NOT press the 2nd floor if there is an escalator. If you do, and feel a karate chop to the neck, don't be surprised. |
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| FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! |
[Sep. 9th, 2005|10:27 am] |
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Fuck! I just spent a half an hour writing an AMAZING post and fucking livejournal lost it. This is the reason why I HATE THESE THINGS! |
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| I Wish I Was 21 Already |
[Sep. 6th, 2005|04:56 pm] |
When your younger, you can't wait to grow-up. More specifically there is this magic number, 21. I'm sure most kids are thinking 18, but even at that age you don't have freedom. I'm not talking financial freedom, I'm talking about the freedom you feel from not being restricted in how you live. When you turn 16 you can finally drive, when you turn 17 you can finally get into those "R" rated movies without sneaking in, when you turn 18 you can smoke legally and vote. That is a lot of options you get, and you'd think that if you can vote on who should become president then you'd have to right state of mind to drink or gamble away a few dollars. But no, just wait until you're 21 for those privledges. It's this waiting game that society gives us so that we can finally have the option to indulge in a few vices or politics. Not that you can run for president yet, you've gotta wait until your 30s for that.
Now I'm 20, and only 2 short months away from being the coveted "21." I know that once I turn 21 people tell me I'm going to wish I was still 20, but I don't care. I've grown very tired of my age, more so as the gap between my birthday and the present day has been getting smaller. I've become more aware of things I missed or am going to miss because I'm not 21 already. It's not like I haven't missed out on these things before, but it's just lately I've been noticing it more and more. It seems like a cruel joke the legal system set up so that you have this building suspense before the date actually arrives. On top of that, since my birthday falls towards the end of the year, I'm ALWAYS one of the youngest, I'm ALWAYS last to do something. It sort of makes me feel left behind, like by the time I get to do it it's been done. As if it won't be as special or monumental. I don't know if I'm making any sense, but to me, it makes perfect sense. It might have nothing to do with logic, but it has everything to do with emotion which can obviously override logic. I WANT that option of drinking something if I want, I WANT the option to put $20 on red 23. Even if I don't choose to do it, it would be my choice. I wouldn't feel left out because I'd be the one leaving myself out of it.
So while I watch other people enjoy the fruits of age, I'll sit around drinking my illegal beer and staring at the slot machines behind glass. I can't wait until I'm 21 and I can stroll about through life knowing that I can do whatever I want...within reason of course. |
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| Premium Popcorn? Say WHAT?!? |
[Aug. 28th, 2005|12:54 am] |
In the following conversation I'm speaking to Kyle (IndianaSchwartz), who I'm sure if you are reading this know already. I love conversations where we talk about something so trivial in a tone and manner where the subject manner takes on greater signifigance. The below is a perfect example of how a conversation such as this would and did transpire just last night.
ReelMike84: Tell me if you agree with this statement. A short time ago, Katie was making a bag of popcorn and she decided she wanted to go upstairs for a moment. She asked me to "watch" her bag. To which I said, "Katie when you place that bag into the microwave you are entering into a contract." She chuckled and walked off before I could finish. But I would have continued by saying that popping popcorn is a rather personal affair. Where the poper is in charge of at which point the popcorns popping should cease to pop. Like a fine cut of meat, it is up to the popper to decide if they want it well done or rare. This not only guarantees that the popcorn is to the popee's liking, but by not including a third party in the situation it leaves said third party blamless for any damage or underpopping the popcorn may occur.
ReelMike84: yea or nay?
IndianaSchwartz: yea
IndianaSchwartz: i completely agree with you
IndianaSchwartz: heheh contract, thats good
ReelMike84: hehe it totally applies
ReelMike84: for that 3 to 4 minutes you are locked in
ReelMike84: these people who are leaving their popcorn unattended, then complain when it's burned
ReelMike84: I scoff at them.
IndianaSchwartz: no yeah i agree
ReelMike84: I wonder where the BEST popcorn is. I'm assuming it would have to be prepopped.
ReelMike84: And some crazy flavor.
IndianaSchwartz: i'm not sure if there's some popcorn somewhere that would make me go "wow...thats the BEST fucking popcorn EVER"
ReelMike84: I'd love to say that someday.
ReelMike84: But I don't see why not. Isn't popcorn in the same league as a potato chip?
ReelMike84: You can encounter amazing chips, whu not amazing popcorn?
IndianaSchwartz: i think the thing about popcorn is that u can put it in different conditions, different flavors, different coverings...but in the end, the popped corn itself is like every other popped piece of corn...in the case of potatoe chips, they're all just potatoes, however the conditions which u put the chip in can actually CHANGE the chip form itself
ReelMike84: Like baking or frying?
IndianaSchwartz: yeah, whereas corn only goes through one thing...popping
ReelMike84: I know the mechanics of popping corn, I know heat + kernel = popcorn. But maybe if I cook it in this 600 year old pot carried over by the pilgrims on the Mayflower, it might change the flavor. Does environment afflect flavor is the question? First thought...no...but maybe I'm wrong.
IndianaSchwartz: i dont know, u may be onto something though
IndianaSchwartz: i think the key to great popcorn...uniquely different popcorn...MUST lie in the popping process...everything else is just glitz and glamour
ReelMike84: It might even come from the kernels themselves. Like corn grown in the soil of the polynesian islands.
ReelMike84: Or hyrdoponicly grown corn.
IndianaSchwartz: yeah...cause there are good corns...maybe popcorn comes from mediocre corn...and if we had GOOd corn...then we'd have amazing popcorn
ReelMike84: I think just maybe. It definitly is a reasonable thought.
ReelMike84: corn isn't all ALL the same, so why should popcorn be all ALL the same
IndianaSchwartz: yeah
IndianaSchwartz: you are right about that
IndianaSchwartz: so there COULD be great popcorn
ReelMike84: there could be, and all we need to do is find the right base
IndianaSchwartz: u have proven your point sir and have swayed my opinion...a task (as you very well know) is not an easy one
ReelMike84: lol, then this sir is a livejornal worthy conversation!
And so I did post it, for everyone to enjoy. |
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| American Movie Classic? C'mon! |
[Aug. 7th, 2005|02:18 am] |
There are two channels that supposedly show films for the cinema ensuthiast; AMC (American Movie Classics) and TCM (Turner Classic Movies). TCM is by far the superior, showing films as they are meant to be seen, unedited, widescree, and commercial free. They always seem to put thought into the films they decide to screen. Often following themes like the films of David Lean, or showing films focused on a particular star from the golden age of Hollywood like Jimmy Stewart or Audrey Hepburn.
Then we have AMC...:sigh:...they really make me cringe. For example, tonight I went to the station and was treated to "Lake Placid." Yes, according to this channel "Lake Placid" is a movie classic. They use this word "classic" so loosely it's pretty ridiculous. Using their barometer, I could say that "Anacondas" and "Baby Genuises" are classics as well. By the way, they've shown "Lake Placid" every other day this month. Once they get a film, like TBS, they hold onto it like a homeless person and their shopping cart. They play it over and over again trying to force you into liking it, always unsuccesfully I might add. Not to mention every 10 minutes you get a slew of commercials advertising more stupid films coming to this channel. In addition, they edit the shit out of these films so that in the end you're watching a film that is only a semblence of its former self. Even bad films deserve to be shown as they were, without being tailored for an infant audience.
I don't get AMC, not at all. Once in a while they do play a good film, but those are totally few and far between. AMC is the perfect example why I don't watch GOOD movies on TV, because it's like watching a car accident. The kiss of death for films is when the end credits go in super fast motion or shrink to half the screen so we can see and hear (cutting out the music from the movie that's playing) a commercial for an episode of Friends where Joey does something stupid, Rachel sleeps with someone new, Monica cooks something, Pheobe plays a guitar, Ross makes a high pitched squeal, and Monica cleans something.
Protest AMC, because it's the right thing to do! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 25th, 2005|12:35 pm] |
Periodically, particularly when I'm bored, I check RottenTomatoes.com for movie reviews. In addition to my usual current film browsing, I like to look up movies that I hated or I know were panned by critcs and just read the one-sentence summaries of the reviews for that film.
Today I looked at the reviews for the 1999 film "Wing Commander." Truly this was one of the worst films I have ever seen. There are very few rented films that have the honor of being shut off before completion. I have a high tolerance for bad cinema, and usually I will watch even the worst films from begining to end. But on the short list is this science fiction disaster.
Here are the highlights of the reviews for this film, a la Rotten Tomatoes:
"Scientific fact: the universe is a big vacuum. Scientific corollary: Wing Commander sucks."
-- Elias Savada, NITRATE ONLINE
"Oh my God, what a piece of crap!"
-- Blake Davis, KFOR CHANNEL 4 NEWS
"Holy carp, this smells worse than my dirty Depends!"
-- Kevin Fiddler, HENDERSON HOME NEWS (HENDERSON, NV)
Doesn't the poster even exude suckiness? As if you would be able to predict, without seeing a single frame, that this film would be awful. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 22nd, 2005|01:02 am] |
I'm going to write an entry about a great movie I just saw, "Crash," but I wanted to share this with you first.
After coming out of the movie, I spotted this poster gleaming on the wall. At first glance I sort of chuckled, but as I walked away the image came back to me and the laughter began to build.
For what seemed like forever, but is probably closer in the range of 5-minutes Kyle and I couldn't stop laughing. My eyes began to tear, I was gasping for breath, even stumbling just trying to control myself. I don't know why, but this is simply one of the funniest posters I have ever seen. Perhaps it's his facial expression, the color scheme, or how his eyes just seem to light up. Whatever it is it has the honor of being the first poster to make me laugh the way I did.
I don't know if it will have the same affect seeing it on a computer screen...but here it is in all it's glory.
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| Star Wars Ends...Finally... |
[May. 18th, 2005|10:37 am] |
Today is the day...well I suppose technically tomorrow is, but at 12:01 AM Thursday morning I will be seeing Star Wars.
This film has been a long time coming, and to be honest after seeing Episodes 1 and 2 I was NOT looking forward to this one. Especially after Episode 2, where I lost all respect for the creative mind of George Lucas.
Still...I can't help but be caught up in all the hype of this upcoming film. I may have swore a boycott of this film in the past, but as the day drew nearer my protective walls started crumbling.
I partially blame Kyle for this, who had me buy a ticket 3 weeks ago. When you have a ticket to a movie that ism't coming out for 3 more weeks you can't help but become anxious when the day finally arrives. I also blame the media, for spreading news that Speilberg actually shed tears over this film and that it recieved a standing ovation at Caanes.
There is a lot riding on this film, and I'm not just talking about my wavering allegance to Lucas. This film is the close of yet another trilogy. Trilogies are sacred since there are so few. In this day and age it's hard not to see sequals, but to make a third film really says something. It's telling a story in 3 parts, and is up against such great trilogies as Indiana Jones and Back to the Future.
Lucas can't fail me...he just can't... |
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| I'm Back Baby! |
[May. 16th, 2005|09:34 pm] |
It appears that I have been resurrected from the depths of internet ranting in livejournal form. Cause for this is a handful of reasons, but mainly because after much time of reflection I realized that I like having a place to vent.
After removing myself from the blog world I had a sense of something missing. I was a war veteran with an amputated leg, who continues to feel phantom pain in his missing limb. Every time I had an itch I would reach down to scratch it, only to find my foot was missing, my blog was missing.
Instead of returning to my once faithful blog, I have decided to move on to greener pastures where much less maintenance is required. I have posted here only a couple times, but expect much more in this space. Prepare to laugh, cry, and be angered in the wake of what is my life.
Buckle your seat belts; it's going to be a bumpy ride. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 9th, 2005|09:37 am] |
The Face Book
I've found a new addiction, The Face Book. Face Book is a site like Friendster and MySpace but it only connects college students. I've found some people on this site that I never thought I'd see again, let alone speak to. But there they are, added to my friend list. This website has given me a few nostalgic moments as I reminisce about yesteryear. More people are using Face Book because of it's simplicity and it's shear size.
According to Kyle, our college wasn't one of the approved universities for a long time. That's why I didn't know this place even existed up until now. But now that I've found it I can't stop searching for people to add. It's a efortless pastime that can give me hours of fun.
Just today I found this girl I haven't talked to since Junior High, and now we're exchanging messages. C'mon, that's amazing!
Pretty soon I'm going to have to be going to FBA (Face Book Anonymous). |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 21st, 2004|08:27 pm] |
The Trigger Happy Student and the Bumbling Professor
My photography teacher did something that really made me question his sanity last Wednesday. Two students in my class had planned to leave sometime mid-class to work on some group project. They had devised a plan for one person to get up and leave, and then 10 minutes later for the second person to follow suit. I thought this plan was genuis, and I would have done it myself. If they had been seen leaving together, not only would that have been seen by the class as "odd" but the teacher would have noticed and remembered. That's what you don't want to happen when you leave class early, for the teacher to remember.
In my astronomy class I always wait for his back to be turned, this way I can leave with him none the wiser. But what these two photography escapees didn't realize, and had no reason to suspect was what the teacher would do.
The plan began, the first person got up and left. That went fine, the teacher may have noticed but didn't think about it. The second person though got trigger happy and screwed up. Not more then a minute passed before he got up and headed for the door. That was the biggest mistake, not waiting the 10 minutes. As he got to the door the teacher said "are you leaving?"
The class froze, not one of us thought the teacher would say anything. The person leaving looked beffudled and couldn't seem to find the words to answer. He said "uh...yea I'm going." I thought that was the end of it, but the teacher asked "why?"
That word was the main reason for the post. A teacher CANNOT ask and expect a student to say why they are leaving. It is really none of the teachers goddamn business. I was stunned to hear the teacher question a student leaving. This isn't high school, this is college! You shouldn't have to explain yourself EVER! What if I was leaving to use the restroom and he asked me "why?" Does he really expect me, an almost 20yo adult to say I'm going to the bathroom? Or what if I had a doctors appointment. Does he want me to announce to the class that I may be sick and I've just infected everyone?
The student sort of mumbled that he had a group project, to which the teacher said "your expected to be here the entire time, you should have scheduled it for later. But I'll let you go." That really took the cake, that last part right there. It's like, "Oh thank you your majesty for allowing me to leave this place of wisdom, I am forever in your debt." A teacher does not allow people to leave, they just leave. By saying that he is allowing you to leave, he is also saying that he has the power to make you stay which he really doesn't. He can't fail you. He'd be up in front of the disciplinary board in minutes.
If I was in his situation I would seriously have stopped it at the very begining by saying "you know what Professor Hitler, you have no right to ask me where I'm going. If I want to go dance around a tree or have an imaginary tea party you can't stop me, because you know why? I pay your salary, and don't give me any of that well I pay you with knowledge shit. You work for me asshole! So go back up in front of the class with your little pointer and do what your paid to do." Yea, that would have put him in his place. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 13th, 2004|10:03 am] |
I can't believe that I am forced to sell out to live journal. Me, the big supporter of Blogger, now has one. This isn't like when I sold out to beenies or trucker hats (c'mon you know I looked good in those), this is a whole nother ballpark.
But like Kyle, who is probably the main reason I decided to do this livejournal thing, I am keeping my blog. This place will only be secondary to me, where I repost things I've written on my blog.
God I can't believe I'm doing. At this rate, I'm probably going to have a xanga as well!
PS: My blog is http://thetelescreen.blogspot.com |
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